My Alters Are Not Crazy, I Am

For as many years as we can remember, the feeling like we were very different, was always there. Maybe not the conscience knowledge of a particular issue, but the unthought-known, something was certainly "special" about us. The almost predictable ridicule and bullying we experienced though our early years, till our post adolescent years, was certainly …

DID-BPD-I’m C-R-A-Z-Y!

Borderline Personality Disorder, and Dissociative Identity Disorder. How the over dramatification and lack of understanding of both coping skills has not only served to drive people to dark places, but also go to furthering the trauma, even compounding it in some cases.

Empowering Choice Without Fear

So many times when we are processing, we wander aimlessly it seems through the depths of our mind. Many times we need to recall later, and as our crazy, fractured existence demands, we forget. Rarely do we have toe foresight to take notes of our adventures inward, looking outward. Making, or trying too, sense of …

Putting Together the Pieces of Acceptance

as we attempt, to once more make reason from irrationality, we are still struggling with many things. We reach for words and concepts that we are so able to grasp minutes before, only to find the remnants of as dream lost to the darkness. We look for clues, we grasp at hints of thoughts, flashes …

Happiness Is Not Always Peace

You know, we really wanted, and still want, to work. We know looking back we cannot. We are not really meant to be around people. Our ability to handle the day to day of people, is a fantasy. This is aside from our later physical limitations. We so desired all these years, to be a …

Expression of Self, Vs Knowing Self

As a member of a now defined system, meaning we share a common organic body, there are many instances, when we overtake another boudoirs. in the life of singlets this happens and most people adjust on the fly, or become known as full of shit. Either way leaves a lasting impression on the receiver of …

Wanting to Run Into Nothingness

The unique place that we, and we suspect many, is to find ourselves is trying too ascertain if we are looking into insanity, or peering into rationality from within the crazy. Always standing on the edge of madness, trying to reason from which perspective we are viewing our lives, can fuel the chaos, and deepen …

Redefining Identity, After Complex Trauma Part II

So many of us that suffer from PTSD/cPTSD, and other associated trauma diagnosis, have no idea at all who we really are.  We only have the misinformed ideas we were taught at such young age.  Many of these ideas, contributed to the trauma, or did nothing more than reinforce the negative perceptions we have about …

Moving Into The Future, and Out Of The Past, With Dissociative Identity Disorder. Part I

We have been having a revelation as of late, a seeming push from deep within our system to seek more than what is currently out there.  We feel that maybe, all of the therapy we have had, albeit lifesaving and helpful, is only the beginning to a recovery that is more evolution than repair.  We …

Triggering a Little, And How To Recover

There has been a delay since our last posting.  Our lives have become somewhat more manageable in certain ways.  We have made choices in our lives that are scary, things we would have never done before.  We have ventured into new space as things would seem, or have we?  Are we just merely following our …